May 1, 2008...11:11 pm
Losing My Religion
Image via WikipediaI was not raised in a conventional “Christian” family. My mother was raised in one Church, and my father considered himself another-yet-wasn’t what you would consider an active part of the Church. When my parents married, and began a family they made the decision to raise their family in the Church of my father’s choosing-the Catholic Church. I can’t help but wonder whether that particular Church was chosen because of any strong feelings on my father’s part, or if it was mostly a decision of convenience as the church was less than two blocks from our home.
For the first nine years or so of my life my religious education was almost completely non existent. I had attended church a few times-my parents did make an attempt on several occasions to begin going and a few times I would tag along with my cousin (my best friend at the time) and her family. But on a regular basis, God’s presence wasn’t exactly felt in our household. At least to me. Eventually I started a formal religious education, but alas, I never took to it. I would go to the religion classes or Church and attempt to make some type of connection between myself and the big Guy upstairs…and it just never happened.
As I got older, I felt myself drifting even further away from Church. I kind of believed in God, or at least a Higher Being but as far as religion or the Catholic Church went…forget it. I didn’t believe all of what I was taught, when I went to Church…it was the same thing week after week, to the point where the “ceremony” lost all meaning. It felt as though I was participating in some over done theatrical act; and not a very good one at that. The interest or connection just was not there…then, to make matters work-the sex scandals started coming to light. That was pretty much it. I felt myself disgusted by the stories and upset that the Church that I was taught to put my trust in faith in could harm people in that way. I didn’t completely stop going to Church, I would attend with my family in order to appease my parents but once there I would just go through the motions with no thought to what I was doing.
Today I don’t consider myself religious. I don’t attend church or even follow a particular religion nor creed. I believe that there is a Higher Being, and I know that my relationship with that Being could be better-but I feel no need to ascribe to a certain Church in order to make a connection. I have morals which I uphold. I enjoy learning about other’s religions and I will freely discuss or debate my own beliefs. I do not enjoy having someone attempt to “sell” me their religion, but I understand why they do it. I know that there are people who honestly do not believe that a person can be content with not having religion in their lives…that’s fine. Religion, Faith and Belief are personal matters and I truly feel that everyone is entitled to their own personal opinions.
15 Comments
May 2, 2008 at 4:48 pm
The last line is perfect and I wish more people thought like that.
May 2, 2008 at 4:56 pm
I’ve never had an issue with individual spiritual beliefs, but as a student and teacher of history I just can’t stomach organized religion. I tend to think of them more like viruses, consuming all in their path to spread their systems.
Honestly, if more people tried to feel a connection to the world, a “higher being” as you put it, or just the sense of right and wrong, the world would be a much better place. Instead, with religions organizations behind them, people have been slaughtering each other for millennia. Seems to miss the point, in my opinion.
May 2, 2008 at 11:04 pm
Interesting, especially considering your parents are both religious. Your family looks open-minded on the subject which is great though.
I’m an atheist myself, but I’m the third generation in my family so no big deal
I wish more people believed in that: “Religion, Faith and Belief are personal matters and I truly feel that everyone is entitled to their own personal opinions.”
Very well put.
May 3, 2008 at 1:28 am
The word religious is highly miss used. I bet you are religious. You are religious if you do anything in a ritualistic manner — such as brushing your teeth.
What you don’t have is a defined faith. I do have a defined faith, and I used to call it Christianity. However, a lot of folks who claim Christianity don’t behave in a Christ-like manner (G. W. Bush comes to mind), so I try to live my beliefs without pinning labels on them. If anyone asks my religion I tell them that I try to behave as I believe God would want me to.
I don’t have any trouble telling people that I believe in God and Jesus. I live and profess my faith. I would gladly explain and share my beliefs with anyone that asks. I don’t follow people around harping at them about what they should and shouldn’t believe. I do have a problem with people who waffle around and won’t say what they believe — or admit they don’t know what to believe.
May 3, 2008 at 8:53 am
As a kid I went to an Anglican church and was involved with the choir and always felt somewhat a part of something bigger than myself…. it didn’t hurt me in any way. In fact I learned something from it. as I got older and moved away from home I only attended church during Christmas with our family. I don’t go now and have thought about it over the years about returning.. everyone has their own beliefs and if and when you are ready to go back, do on your own terms and without feeling guilty about not going… You are a good person and deserve His love.. This was a very well thought out post.. thanks you for sharing…
May 3, 2008 at 4:14 pm
I love how you ended it. Ideally everyone’s faith should be personal. I am perplexed by how prevalent a very narrow view of Christianity has become. There is no ONE WAY to worship. I don’t believe anyone has an exclusive hot line to God — rather, we all do.
You seem to be on your own religious path. It took me years, soul searching and investigation to find my own congregation, and worshipping there makes me happy and brings me peace. I wish the same for you — a way and place to worship that makes you happy and brings you peace, whether it’s in a pew or not.
May 3, 2008 at 10:13 pm
Wow! I just found you via Malcolm’s blog and was amazed to find this post. I have been writing an entire blog on this very topic and am getting ready for my final “grand finale” post which is titled “why religion and God don’t mix”.
I left a comment to your comment over at Malcolm’s because I think you will like my blog that is a tribute to musicians who have died:
http://laylasclassicrick2.blogspot.com/
Take care and sorry for shamefully plugging myself on your blog, I normally don’t do that.
May 3, 2008 at 11:07 pm
This was really interesting to read, thanks for sharing your experience. I like what the previous commenter said that “There is no ONE WAY to worship. I don’t believe anyone has an exclusive hot line to God — rather, we all do.” - that makes a lot of sense to me.
May 3, 2008 at 11:12 pm
The church is so imperfect because it is made up of human beings who are always imperfect. I have a very strong faith and very close relationship with my Savior but I don’t believe in “preaching” to anyone. I also don’t believe in going door to door to try to convert people and invite them to church. Usually if someone wants to go to church, they’ll go. I am a very open minded and non-judgmental Christian. I think that’s the way Christians are supposed to be.
May 4, 2008 at 10:09 am
We agree - each to their own.
May 4, 2008 at 10:26 am
Excellent and honest post, Silver - well done for being true to your own beliefs!
May 4, 2008 at 7:05 pm
I am not big on religion either. I do believe in the Christian message and that the relationship with God is a personal one made possible through Jesus Christ. However organized religion is not what Jesus had in mind, that is man’s idea.
The ‘traditional church’ has done more harm to the simple message that Jesus preached than any other organization. History proves that not much Christianity was happening in the church anyway and still does not.
May 5, 2008 at 11:36 am
“Honestly, if more people tried to feel a connection to the world, a “higher being” as you put it, or just the sense of right and wrong, the world would be a much better place.”
and thats exactly why i believe in g-d, but i do not believe in any organized religion.
May 5, 2008 at 12:16 pm
You’re right. Believing in a higher being is a personal matter and thus a right.
I think it only becomes a problem when it becomes an intrument of power and repression. It’s almost as if most leaders do not believe in a God but exercise it anyway to gain votes as well as the upper hand.
May 7, 2008 at 9:15 am
In a world this big there are bound to be multiple ideals on religion, faith, who is God (or what is God). I think everyone should be free to decide or their own.
Or not decide if they so choose.
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